Welcome back! If you’re new here, it’s nice to meet you! If you’ve visited, I’m glad you are working through your stuff, and I know it can’t be easy. In the Journality community, we provide a safe space for all things healing! We practice processing through journaling on topics such as body image, self-confidence, gratitude, boundaries and SO much more. I’m happy you’re here.
**Today’s topic will feel heavy to many of us. Especially those who struggle with their own body image and/or disordered eating. This is a gentle reminder to take care of your mental well-being as you proceed** I will be sharing a vulnerable journal entry from my very own, private journal. Some of you may relate to this journal entry, and for that, I am truly sorry. It’s a difficult place to be mentally when you are rejecting the physical body that you’re living in. I share this journal entry in hopes of shining a bright light onto my deepest wounds and shadows. I encourage you to get out your journal and reflect on the following passage (if that feels in alignment with you). 04/15/2021 Dear body, I’m sorry there were so many days I couldn’t take you outside. I was ashamed. You deserved to feel the beautiful sun, the wind on your face but I couldn’t get up. I know I should have set you free, how could I though? You don’t belong to me. I wanted you perfect in every single way, because of me we missed out on countless ‘perfect’ days. Staring, wishing, wanting something that is not; that’s no way of living I’m afraid, it’s just not. I’m sorry for the days I would glare. You were trying desperately to blend in, to take up less air. I punished you, teased you and yelled for days on end. You had to act okay, you always had to pretend. Do you see the picture I’ve painted? It's not the real me. I’m trying to heal these shadows but I fear they’re buried deep. I’m trying hard to find my self, the one I’m meant to be- filled with compassion, kindness and life left to breathe. Once I find her again, and I’m sure it will be tough- I know in my heart that you will finally be enough. I invite you to jot down your immediate thoughts.
I am meeting my body with kindness and truly apologizing for all that I have put it through. It didn’t deserve to be punished, and neither do you. If this is something you are struggling with, it may be helpful for you to write a letter to your body as well. Try talking to your body as if it is a close friend. This may provoke feelings of compassion. Take that compassion and turn it inwards. Feel how it feels to have compassion for your own self and body. You deserve the same kindness that you constantly give to others. With so much exposure to our external worlds, it can feel impossible at times to love and accept ourselves just as we are. But, I firmly believe that it is the only way through. The love has to come from within and no individual can convince you to love yourself until you feel ready to do so. As you process these big emotions, it’s okay to feel all the feelings. They are heavy and it is not an easy weight to hold. I am thankful you are here. I hope you will find a sense of belonging through this vulnerability. Remember, your Journality is waiting.
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AuthorGrateful to share my love for journaling with the world and the Journality community. |